I’m often compared to Yahtzee when I write these things, well that’s what my internet friends say. So when I stumbled upon a few comments, a few little nitpicks and few tidbits of hate-email, I just had to break them all down. I just had to somehow let out my shallow little yellow thing that is my pen… I mean sense of humour. So, let the trollin’ begin!

TROLLIN’ BEGINS

Posted by Pistolero

This was one of the stupidest articles I have ever seen posted on N4G. Pure fanboy trash.
I still play this game to this day. The author of this article is a moron.

‘Fanboy trash’, what do you think I am? Well.. you think I’m a fanboy? If I was a fanboy then why would I have a column on a gaming site? Surely Platform Nation has something against people like me… apparently. I’m pretty sure we’ve inforced a ‘NO IDIOTS RULE’, and if this is the law of this humble gaming site then don’t even bother coming on here. Because you sir would be… able to browse through our articles, because we’re not idiots.

Posted by Marceles

huge disagree with this article, it’s articles like this which makes Crackdown the most underrated game on the 360..hell…practically the most underrated overall this gen.

Okay, okay even I must admit that Crackdown is possibly some of the funnest co-op I’ve ever played. But I think I brought up a valid point on why it’s underrated, and that is the Halo 3 Beta. If it was just free on Xbox Live or able to play on somewhere else, I dare say that Crackdown would have been played by a lot more people. Not written off as some disc included with the Halo 3 Beta.

Posted by cherrypie

This article is written like a 12-year-old’s first fanboy FUD attemp.

Crackdown is one of the cult-hits and fan-favorites of the generation, it is hailed as a under-rated classic.

Dont believe me? Try and buy a used copy at EBGames (etc). Crackdown is normally in very short supply, and always at a price premium.

Why? Because gamers know it’s a fcuking AAA title. And this article’s writer is worried about this:

Correction, 14 year old’s first attempt at fanboy FUD. I never said Crackdown was overrated, I never said it wasn’t an underrated title (or that it was). Also, why would I be worried that it was selling? I don’t have trouble finding it in the UK, and even then I’d be happy that it was selling. I could never find a co-op partner on my week of replaying.

Posted by Halo 3 MLG Pro

So many nooby websites out there.

I agree

Posted by Eiffel

This article be teh fail!

THAT’S WHAT SHE SAID!

i3eyond the Circle

Uh…

Nice try article?

Go on the PsN and you’d get a nice hefty list of games no one plays anymore.

Eye of Judgment anyone?

Yep, I will find a hefty list of games no one plays anymore. I’ll find that on Xbox Live too.

Oh and we’ll get to the Eye of Judgement one day kids

Posted by Pistolero (again)

How does this ps3 nerd even know how many people are playing this game?…I still play it all the time and I love it. No game that is several years old is going to be played as much as newer games…but how is Crackdown any different than any other game in that way? This was by far one of the most trolling and moronic articles I have ever read.

The Oscar for ‘Most Ignorant Moron’ goes to you sir. If I was a ‘PS3 nerd’ then surely I wouldn’t be on PLATFORM Nation, I’d be on PLAYSTATION Nation. Hurmm? I don’t know how many people are playing this game, I try and judge a game on its Xbox Live player rating thing and how old it is. Oh and if it was one of the most ‘trolling and moronic articles’ you’ve ever read, just open your eyes and you’ll find more.

Posted by vega75

You could see the aurthur of this article doesn’t have a clue. I can put in perfect dark and could get a room to this day. Yeah it may take a minute to get a full room. But none the less people are still playing it.

Hurmm.. of course I didn’t have a clue, I’m not Sherlock Holmes. Of course I haven’t played it. I don’t judge ‘GTNPA’s on how many people actually play it, I judge it on when the majority of people who ONCE played it, stop playing it. If you know what I mean?

Blink_44

Every console has a lot of games that no one plays anymore…why make a article only about 1?

I’m guessing the N4G.com guys only got one of the GTNPAS… oh well… can’t blame them.

Rowsdower

online gaming news is horrible

So are online gaming news comments.

TROLLIN’ ENDS HERE

Why am I doing this article? Well maybe I want to abuse my power, humiliate people and generally make myself look like a twit… which I’ve been doing anyway. No, I want to do this article to ‘troll the trolls’. I’m pretty sure they’d be happy to get a reply from me, a personal reply.

And if they don’t like it, I have ways of making them like it.

Bribery >:D

Sources of comments: N4G Comments

I saw Doctor Horrible for the first time.

Brilliant.

Yeah you’ve heard the rest from everybody else. Now watch it. Now. Now.

]]> http://thepurpleview.wordpress.com/2009/08/10/doctor-horrible/feed/ 0 Nathan Hardisty the hammer is my penis http://thepurpleview.wordpress.com/2009/05/23/so-yeah-i-write-for-platformnation/ http://thepurpleview.wordpress.com/2009/05/23/so-yeah-i-write-for-platformnation/#comments Sat, 23 May 2009 15:19:35 +0000 Nathan Hardisty http://thepurpleview.wordpress.com/?p=365 ]]>

So yeah, I got myself a bit of a job. Writing for an actual games site. My first post can be found here and keep an eye out for those articles which are so bizare- they own.

Is this place dead? Ish. I’ll be post like once a week and usually it won’t be an article. Another Damn Politics Show will have a post up later today though

Peace out

We’re slowing down.

Once or twice a week, whenever I can find the time. Sorry, so sorry. Series of stuff is probably on hold and schedule is just about cancelled.

Once again, sorry

E3′s been around a while now, I would be bothered to search Wiki for exactly how long but I’m a busy man, and maybe too long. We’ve seen it gone from the highest of highs, lowest of lows and the most mediocre mediocrities. Hopefully that’s a word. But E3 has changed it’s face so many times, we can’t help but look up at it and think “The damn plastic surgery must cost a load…”. By plastic surgery I refer to of course, the many faces of the Electronic Arts expo. It’s been a long road and some bumps have been smoothed, but the tarmac’s still there and so are the women drivers and their lack of sense of direction. Just kidding, I have nothing against women driving. Quite frankly, I have an uptight philosophy which many of my friends share with me. That philosophy is “If it has terrible driving skills, shame on it. If it just so happens to have breasts, leave it be.”

Before I end up sounding like a sexist pig now ranting on and on and on and on about women drivers, let’s concentrate on the matter at hand. E3 has kicked around for a while and , as Nintendo says so, you can never beat a dead horse too much. It’s always going to give a slight twitch. I was thinking about what to start with, and it was staring me right in the face. Actually it didn’t, and this is just a device that us writers use to make us sound cool – for all you know we could be nerds without a home – but I have a home. So, what I saw was the time. E3 has been around for so long that it’s outside of our own dimension. Games come and go, but so does technology, I can actually still remember a couple of years ago, the Killzone 2 CG trailer. Boy, we were hyped. Never had a game given us so much crying, graphical beauty to cry over. Well that’s what I did. But you’ve got to still take into account what Killzone 2 came out as. A healthy baby boy… ish. Aside from a few little niggles, giggles and tomfoolery; the game didn’t look far from it’s E3 CG trailer counterpart. But that’s coming from a graphic whore.

Now, E3 has shifted from public event to journalist eyes only to media only to corporate superpowers only and now finally seems to come back to public event. Ish. E3 2009 will be the hybrid of journalistic and public events. I think. So really we’re getting a journalic or publinournal event. I like being a lexicon fusionist. Makes me feel big at parties. Anyway, E3 2009 is going to showcase a bucketload of games and we’re going to be watching them, seeing them, jacking off to the CG trailers and then wrapping the raw file around… yeah. It’s going to be a pretty special E3 and I’m not hoping for games, which is odd since it’s an expo for video-game software and hardware. I’m looked forward to E3 itself because I’m going to it! In real life! Not really, I can’t be bothered to book the plane tickets and I’d probably die of travel sickness. But I am still looking forward to E3!

Kojima Productions are going to announce their new title, Microsoft says they’ll be showing off something to define home entertainment and Sony are being Sony. The crafty slackers. Nintendo doesn’t count because they pushed a MILF on stage last year and it still didn’t work. I’d complain and rant about Nintendo’s E3 performance but I’m short on time, money and sperm. Actually the last one is untrue. Now, what I’m expecting is the hype. You know, the old fashioned “OMGWHATARETHEYGONNADOOMGTONYHAWKDIDALULZ” E3 hype. But I’m also looking forward to those shocker moments, and those depressing moments for fanboys everywhere. You’ll find out from searching the interweb that the FFXIII 360 announcement made a lot of grown men cry… and PS3 fanboys. The thing that I guess everyone, who’s actually going, is looking forward to the speeches and keynotes by publishers and developers. Some of them will also be looking forward to the booth babes… and Jade Raymond… maybe they’re the same. Wait… yes… yes they are.

This show has gone off air for now and the only way you can find the series is if you downloaded it or on Yutub. I say Yutub because they still do HQ. Anyway, Newswipe is quite simply brilliant in every sense. I wasn’t a fan of Charlie Brooker or his Screenwipe before Newswipe, but that was before I went all cynic. Now I think everyone is shit and nitpick things ‘because they’re there’, and it’s all thanks to him. Newswipe consists of Charlie pointing at news programs, news reporters or news blahs and explains them. In fact, here’s just a little bit of his genius to tickle your tastebuds.

I loved Life on Mars, loved it like say a child of my own. But the only ladybits I could look at was… that woman who always followed Sam around and in the end rejected his offer for sex. Then they got back together after he died again. It’s all Sci-Fi mess, but it’s brilliant mess. So brilliant, it’s just… it’s hard to say. Now apply this to Ashes to Ashes but with even more ladybits, a boomingly good soundtrack and quite simply some of the best writing in telly. Also, Keeley Hawes. Good god I’ve never wanted to have sex more badly with a TV show, jesus christ… I mean… phwooaaaarr….

Okay bare with me. BGT is the most orchestrated and downright dumbed down reality shows ever. It screams more cherry picking than a triple cunted hooker on virgin street. It’s stupid, it’s cynacil and sometimes even offensive. It shows us all that Britain has some talent, but mostly we’re a country of sheep shaggers, hoodlums and the worst talent on the planet. That’s not to say we’re bad, just the show presents us that way, and if Ant and Dec could just stop FUCKING trying to be funny for one FUCKING second after the ad break interludes then maybe I’d like it more. FUCKING hell. You could argue that I shouldn’t like it because it’s just stupidly orchestrated and panned out by the editors, and then cherry picked to death. Well my reply would be – smoke and mirrors still make a good show. Oh and this guy.

In the UK and richer countries, you just have to pop into your GP, ask for some medication after he’s diagnosed you and you’re done. Easy street. Except without the hookers. >_>. The pandemic scale currently registers at five, with six being a full blown pandemic. In a conversation with my Science teacher, he said that their will be a full blown stage six by the end of the week. But he also predicted we’d hit the oil peak around 4 months ago. Don’t trust anyone except yourself, especially when making decisions. It’s like deciding to either take a shit or wait fordiarrhea. Well, not like that at all

Mon11th – Television: My top 3 watchable shows

Wed 13th – WHATS SO GOOD ABOUT…. FUCK… : Rant on how putting things in series sucks

Fri 15th – So… Comic Books : Rant on comic books and how unappreciated they are

Mon 18th -What’s So Good About MGS?: Introduction : OOOH YEAH, TAKING ON METAL GAER

Wed 20th – What’s So Good About MGS?: Graphics : Not as pretty as you think

Fri 22nd – What’s So Good About MGS?: Story : Gonna burn dis shit up dawg

Mon 25th – So I Heard You Like Filmkipz – 17 Again : Guest review by some niggggggerian horsemen

Wed 27th – What’s So Good About MGS: Gameplay : Gonna bern it sum moar

Fri 29th – What’s So Good About MGS : Conclusion…? : Might burrrrn it some more…?

So what have I been up to during GTA Month? Well first off, Another Damn Politics Show. You’ve obviously spotted the bar right next to home. I’ve decided to enter the realm of politcal ranting and satire. Probably launching at the end of May with articles. The full show should launch later this year, at the start of October I hope. Probably kill me, but wut the buck right?

I also wrote a book.

And that’s it. May Schedule on Wednesday :3

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