The Purple View

Reviews, rants and purpleness

This Gun Is The Best Gun Ever! Part One

Posted by Nathan Hardisty on March 2, 2009


So begins a little tribute I’ve had in mind for a while, an actually LOVING article… heh… you don’t see those too often on this site now do you? It all begin in nineteen tickety twelve, when Adolf Hitler was learning mathmatics and Muhammed Ali was still being form in his father’s ballsack… it was the launch of… Maze War in 1973, and I can’t be bothered to find any screen shots… and I haven’t even played it so sthu. The number one FPS I remember playing, right after Half-Life, was Doom!

Those fuzzy memories of… fuzzy enemies and cowering down low-res corridors… bring a tear of nostaglia to my eye. No they don’t, they bring back memories of eternal tortue, ol’ school games were meant to be retro and fun – nostaglic and generally awesome…  but this was frustrating for me! Nowadays I’m a FPS ace, but picking up the FREE version of PC… makes me think I’ve been this good all the time… and Doom hates me! The REAL first FPS was of course Maze War – but it sucked so we’ll leave that out. 

Wolfenstein 3D came up next and was generally Doom, but with different textures and such – butt the gameplay felt a bit more relaxed and smoothed out… bit easier too. I’m guessing you guys don’t take difficulty as a factor when playing or reviewing games, but being stressed from losing game – that’s not fun at all. A game is meant to challenge you, not give the enemies just infinite grenades on the highest difficulty… I’m looking at you World at War.

Then came the Quake-e-mundo – probably even rewrote the whole godamn laws of physics and first person shooters when it came out. It was the first series to implement multiplayer, and well… I hate to say it, but maybe they broke the first person concept over it’s knee. First person means viewed from the eyes of ONE person -someone you can connect and share with – and view their epic experiences… online however, you’re just another mindless drone on the road to level 30. I’m fighting an invalid cause here though, because FPS multiplayer is , imo, the best multiplayer around… yeah… we’ll come on to that.

So then came Half-Life… read my WSGA? series for my verdict on that. People say that Half-Life was a defining FPS, I say it was just a dumed down version of Doom with better graphics and sensibler story… if that’s a word. Well that’s just about FPSs before 2000, before Halo trashed everything and ruined our nostalgia for reals. I would comment that the 10 years before 2000, were the golden ages of FPS – but then I’d look at modern hits such as Bioshock and COD4, smile and nod, then thing ‘maybe it’s still going strong…’ then look to the pile of Halo clones and cry from unbelief.


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