The Purple View

Reviews, rants and purpleness

The Lost and Damned Review

Posted by Nathan Hardisty on April 1, 2009

Review-mundo

Welcome to Grand Theft Auto Month my little chums, also known as April to the simpletons, our first article may be overdated but needs to be done! The Lost and Damned is a small little chunk of the main GTA IV world, and follows some skinhead called Johnny and his gang called ‘The Lost’, cept they’re not a gang – they’re a motorcycle gang. So basically they rape women, do uppys with their hands and listen to hardcore rock and roll all the time. I’ll describe the story in a mo’ though. For now let’s concentrate on the comparison.

 

Harder... ooh

Harder... ooh

GTA IV started off with Niko just about being pushed into liberty city head first, and ended up being a dragged out emotional wreck that we couldn’t relate to. Sure we felt a bit sympathetic, but with his priority being money and most of the characters being more likeable than he was: he ain’t exactly the best protagonist so far. Sorry if I’m getting a tad of the subject here, most of the ranting of the comparison will be in tomorrows article. But anyway, I didn’t like Niko even the slightest. I’d take one look at even Brucie and wanted to be him, with those tight muscular abs and bull seman surging around his body.

Johnny Klebitz is a fucking hard man. By hard I mean he’ll stand up to a guy twice the size and muscular strength of him and tell him to fuck off, and he has no regrets. He does it for the club and not for himself, oh and he’s a jew. What adds to his hardness is the fact that when one of the gangs goes bust halfway through the game, he’ll be screaming at the other side and wanting to double barrel everyone to hell. The whole sense of him is a screaming raging typhoon and well, he’s probably one of the most likeable guys yet – even if he’s not the focus of the main game. Which reminds me, I killed myself on the heroine mission with Playboy, all I had to do was put a few bucks into Niko. So technically it was suicide? Or not.

 

Pick me up, when you go go

Pick me up, when you go go

The Lost and Damned adds just 12 hours tops of storyline experience, but there’s obviously a lot more. There a lot of new toys to play with from grenade launchers to sawn-off shotguns, would’ve been nice to have them put into the Niko strand too. The main focus on the biker gang can get a little fuzzy, as the appearance of a biker gang that makes money is a tad out of range. Never the less, the actual bikes handle like a charm and I never want to get off my two wheeled wonder in TLAD. The formation system while cruising with your buddies is a lil’ bit short, but the focus off meeting with your buddies works like a charm.

In IV, it was all about relationships and connection with people. In TLAD, it’s about giving the middle finger to as many people as once. I’ll let you decide which one you prefer, but getting drunk with your vitural cousin is obviously less fun than pumping grenade pellets into a window and then beating the shit out of the flaming corpses. At the bottom line The Lost and Damned is a more condensed and free experience, it succeeds in making GTA fun again. You may be thinking though “just the same mechanics but with biker boots” well….

 

Johnnys personal parking ticket

Johnny's personal parking ticket

You fucking morons! All these new toys change everything, and by everything I mean everything. Instead of being the pussy taking cover and waiting for the enemies to reload, just take out an automatic shotgun and pump lead into all of them before they have a chance to even inhale. There’s still a cover system in TLAD, but it just seems like instead of hugging the cover, you’re tapping it on the back and jumping out. A new emphasis of “beat the shit out of everyone” requires less of a linear pathway, and you can rush in just about anywhere and beat the crap out of every single one of them!

Anything else I missed? Ah, the film grain filter. What this does is add a small grainy filter to TLAD and makes it look all fuzzy and terrible, Rockstar wanted TLAD to look different visually, luckily it can be turned off via the start menu. There’s nothing else much to not say about TLAD, it’s just a better experience. In fact, I hate to say it, but a more condensed and generally better experience released more regulary is better than a £40/$60 ticket to mediocracy. I hate to even say it more but TLAD is an example for all future GTA games, a more episodic and bite sized experience is better than a droned out one. Peace out morons

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